My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
I only knew it was midnight because i got happy new years texts while i puked outside
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
I'm determined to sit on that face.
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
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