she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
we made out on top of his cat.
apparently the secret to your success is patron
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
Just realized my relationship wasn't even Facebook official and I'd already cheated on him. 'Shitty girlfriend' is an understatement.
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
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