Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
i just caught my roommate coming out of the bathroom half naked with a surge protector. he told me he didn't wanna talk about it.
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
Are you hungover?
No. I'm hiding under my covers and hoping it doesn't find me.
Randomize
