he pissed his pants, and she still wants to hook me up with him. I try not to date guys with bladder control problems... Unless they're loaded anyway.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
When you wanted to give that guy at McDonalds your number you asked the cashier if you could borrow "a pen or just like a straw with his blood on it". He gave you a pen.
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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