So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
??? When I first met her at the bar, she told me she was 23. After I bought her 3 shots of tequila, she told me she was really only 21. When we went back to my house, she said she was really only 19. She's still sleeping next to me butt naked. I'm afraid if she opens her mouth again I could be looking at 10 years.
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
I wanna get so fucked up that I try to catch a coyote in a pillowcase, breakdance fight a lion, and send back some toast at Denny's when I see its slightly burnt.
Since she's grinding up on your thigh right now, I'm sending you this text hoping it makes your phone vibrate in her vagina
I accidentally asked my mom for a blowjob because 'mom' and 'molly' are next to each other in my address book.
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize
