He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
Randomize
