i just had sex bonerless
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
In the middle of having sex with me, she reminded me that I was supposed to call my mom that morning. My penis has never retracted so quickly.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
Randomize
