I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
i gained so much weight this year, i put on my string bikini underwear and couldnt see the string anymore! i hate my life.
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
He asked me if my princess crown was real and before I could say yes, he was already reaching to put it on. I'm pretending I'm asleep if he tries to have sex.
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Randomize
