IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
I'll wind up on his doorstep with a confused "oh you live here" expression, a feigned ankle injury and a seemingly fortunately placed bottle of tequila. I don't care what it takes: HIS MOUTH WILL BE ON MOUTH.
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
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