Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
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