we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
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