she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
Randomize
