Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
He wanted to watch a Charlie Brown thanksgiving. But I was like, fuck that, I'm a grown up. So we watched jumanji and I sucked his dick.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
Randomize
