jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
If u ever apologize to me for "too-rough" sex again I will suspend ur all-access pass to my vagina indefinitely
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
Do you have Pokemon Go yet? I just caught a Clefairy on my walk of shame and feel way better about myself.
Randomize
