Tell your broad to take a big shot of 'chill the fuck out' and put it on my tab.
If that was your dad, he is hot
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
Randomize
