May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
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