Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
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