I just met a guy from Australia at the bar. I asked him what it was like down under and he told me if I went home with him he'd let me find out. I love Australians.
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Randomize
