WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
dear vagina, thank you for making it so goddamn hard to get pregnant. i love you.
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
I'm putting his belongings the garage sale so he can buy his own stuff back. # divorced life. Thanks for cheating on me you tone deaf dick biscuit that'll be $20. Haha.
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Randomize
