have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
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