I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
I'm going to CVS to meet the Craigslist guy who is going to buy my underwear. If I don't text you within the next hour, plz assume that I have been abducted by a stranger with an underwear fetish.
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
Randomize
