Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
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