He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
I just brushed my teeth. In the car. With watered down Sprite. From Saturday. Multi-tasking at its finest.
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
Just woke up from a first date on the futon watching Arrested Development by myself, him cuddling another chick in his room. Simultaneously the best and worst one night stand in history.
Bonus: took me 2 hours to get home on the streetcar cause I spent my cab money on drinks for his friend last night.
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
Randomize
