You work out of a Hotel?
I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
I force fed him french fries and then proceeded to tell him how sexy corgi’s are … it’s safe to say he’s not texting me for a second date.
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
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