the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
Maybe i shouldn't have told him the key to getting in my pants was double vodka sodas and Nelly's song "grillz."
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
I’m really upset they canceled the conference. Since the divorce I’ve been working out, I bought cute new outfits and even found a bikini I liked. Now it’s all online. You can’t get laid at a webinar
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
Randomize