remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
i just woke up from a 4 hour nap, still drunk, to make mac n cheese.
Randomize
