Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
Randomize
