just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
totally just realized while washing my face that Cetaphil looks like semen.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
Randomize
