what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
You called me twice to tell me that you spit in your own eye, when I was right next to you.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
Found the puke drawer
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
Randomize
