I like to think it a success when the cops are called
My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
I think pants incapable of making pants work
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Randomize
