Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
So here's a brief summary of my weekend: last night I drank four glasses of Death Punch, grabbed the toaster, said "This is mine", put it in my pants and walked out the front door.
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
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