but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
chick im bringing home just asked our cab driver if she could do a line off his turban. i think im in love - or trouble.
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
Now that we have successfully procreated, I need to know we are on the same page. Please tell me you are aware that there are whole seasons of our lives that our child can NEVER be made privy to.
We should probably write this down. That's a shit load of shit.
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
Randomize
