so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
She's JV to your varsity
I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
I am in a vortex of obligation.
I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
I had an epiphany. If a dude dressed up as Batman to ask me out, I'd prolly marry him.
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
stop texting me about your public sex.
says she who narrated getting eaten out in a movie theatre over text to me
Randomize
