I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
Just threw up my room service breakfast with my fake eyelashes and pearls still on.
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
My vagina is officially offended.
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
Randomize