WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
Randomize
