in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
Randomize
