please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
Just finished off half a bottle of vodka. Can't take in anymore liquids so I ate 3 spoonfuls of your powdered gatorade to fight off the hangover. Wish me luck and check me for a pulse when you get in!
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
Randomize
