Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
His fucking flight got canceled because the president stopped at the airport he was flying out of... Fuckin Obama literally just cock blocked me
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
The poop emoji wasn't even in my recents. Does that mean I'm growing up?
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