think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
Totally acceptable.
I'm just going to text him the word sex repeatedly until he comes over.
Did it work?
Duh, it only took 27 texts and 15 minutes and he was at my front door.
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
Randomize
