New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
Randomize
