i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
Randomize
