I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
My farts smell like St. Pauli Girl. Last night was too much for a Monday.
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
Randomize
