singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
the russians are downstairs with the vodka loudly proclaiming happy birthday america. i don't care if it's the fourth, i care that it's 9 am and they woke me up.
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize