Me too!
I want to have your abortion
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
Awkward drunk fist bump with the boss. Not sure if tomorrow will be weird or wonderful.
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
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