Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
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