y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
He tried to kiss me in the middle of hooking up... it was a deal breaker. I got off him and left.
So making out with chicks at the bar is fine and dandy, but your booty call can't kiss you? You have the strangest fucking rules...
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
Randomize
