Walk of Shame. In a state park.
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
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