Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
Randomize
