sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
I just had to explain to the pharmacy cashier that the Plan B and thank you notes I was buying were not related.
gail simmons from food & wine magazine just heard me order my plan b pill
did you ask her what wine to pair it with?
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
The cute guy in my class hurt himself and is on crutches. My first thought was "Good. He'll be easier to take down." Like he's a gazelle and I'm a dick tiger. What's wrong with me?
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
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