Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
Randomize
