y did u give ur computer a hand job?
Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
Bottom line; if I'm coming out of my bat cave to do the dishes and get a chicken wing and I have no pants or makeup on and my messy bun looks more like Santa got leprosy and crashed his sled into the back of my head then let me be. That's all I'm saying.
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
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